Even far far away
from home I still
am turning my head
at all times
double checking corners
I’ve already swept
I am convinced my
dad knows a third
of the city-
Or my moms side will spot
me coincidentally
who will my face be familiar to?
I am too paranoid
to be outside
with her hand in mines
and not be out
Under a roof
we take advantage
of comfort
and remove our clothes
and are too busy loving each other
to hear the locks undo themselves
We are scrambling
like we overslept 3 alarms
we get everything that proves her existence here
we shove them and her
into my closet
and this is not the first time
It’s actually routine
She makes a joke and says
“It’s cool, I know my place”
I weep inside from being tired
of tiring lovers
stuffing them into a place
they were less coward
than me to escape
She says
when you’re with me
you always worried
like you are scared
to be with me
I apologize for turning
her into a skeleton
she move bones
that are dense
to make space for
herself in my closet
When we are alive and around
My mom
We become bestfriends
I know lights
dim for her
We look up to see hoodies and jeans hanging
looking like the bottom of dirty feet
I am sorry
for the girls I’ve turned
into only bones
They all tell me
it is okay
and that they understand
But my closet is beginning to become full
and dry
of girl’s dead tiredness
I hope to have the courage to become their alive self
Out
And I’m wondering
Maybe, I just need to stop having sex in my parents home
when I don’t know when they get off work
Editor’s Note: AIDS Foundation Chicago (AFC) partnered with Young Chicago Authors (YCA) to feature poetry on our blog for the first time that was made by, celebratory and inclusive of our communities. AFC’s audience includes LGBTQ+ folks, HIV+ folks, Black and Brown people, everyone at those intersections and more. We invited YCA to invite its poets who were members of those communities, as well as poets who create poetry that speaks to and is celebratory of those communities to write for AFC’s blog. This is a first-ever partnership highlighting the work of young artists in our community. We’re thankful to YCA for their partnership and to the young artists who contributed to this effort. Let us know if you’d like to see more poetry on our blog by emailing info@aidschicago.org. To support YCA in its development of young artists, donate here. To connect with Nilah, follow her on Instagram at weloveyouhere_
Categorized under Inside Story.
